Dear Billy Ray Cyrus,
This morning in the Webb home you would have heard YOUR daughter’s song, “The Climb,” played on You Tube, over and over again, by MY daughters. You see, Emily, my 8 year old, and her class are singing “The Climb” this morning during the closing assembly at her elementary school and she wanted to practice.
I was saddened as I listened to the words and watched scenes from Miley’s movie, “Hannah Montana,” flash across my laptop.
Hannah Montana has been a part of my family for years. For crying out loud, my 3½ year-old daughter, Mia, has been pretending to sing like “Hannah Tannah” since she could walk.
My girls adore her and I have always adored her daddy, Robby Ray.
You see, I would have loved to have had a daddy like Robby Ray. A daddy that held me to a high standard and expected the best from me; a daddy that put his daughter first, held her, and gently taught her those things only a daddy can teach a girl. Robby Ray was that daddy. I can’t tell you how many episodes I cried through. I adored Robby Ray and in my mind Billy Ray and Robby Ray were the same. So I adored you too. Until recently. Not because of your success in music. I’m not a big country fan. I adored you because of the daddy I thought you were. Like I said, until recently.
Billy Ray, can I give you some advice? Perhaps this week, while the 85 “Hannah Montana” reruns play, grab a bag of popcorn, sit down with Trish, and watch them together. Check out the way Robby Ray parents his beautiful daughter, how he lovingly reigns her back in every time she starts to get off course, pay special attention to the high standard he teaches her to live by.
Perhaps when you watch those reruns, instead of grabbing the popcorn, pick up a notebook and pen. I think Robby Ray could teach you a whole lot about parenting.
Sincerely,
A Crushed Fan
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Two Buckets
I seldom get angry. Do my feelings get hurt? Yep. Am I sometimes sad? Yep. Get frustrated? Yep, that happens sometimes too. But angry? Very rarely. Most times when I’m angry it has little to do with me. It’s when someone does something that could hurt someone I love.
I got angry last night. You guessed it. Something was being done that could hurt people that I love. At first, I couldn’t even define how I felt. Randy gave me a huge hug and asked what was wrong. I stumbled through a few words before I figured it out and blurted, “I’m angry. That’s what’s wrong. I’m angry!”
I know, many of you are laughing at me right now, but STOP it… or I’ll be angry again today.
So last night in my anger, in a weak moment, I was going to say something. Well, to be more accurate, type something. I had just about had it with a few individuals. I typed it and all I had to do was hit the “share” button on facebook. I didn’t want to be mean; I just wanted to nicely tell them to shut up.
Yes, I did just say shut up. Am I being a little too real here?
Then the Holy Spirit tapped me on the shoulder and reminded me of that stupid Two Bucket illustration Pastor Bob Kapp uses.
Of course, I only say it's stupid because it was the last thing I wanted reminded of last night. I wanted to react. Perhaps I am being too honest? But let's be real, I bet everyone reading this has felt that was at some point.
Anyway, those of you that are CLA’er might have heard the bucket illustration before. For those of you that have not heard it; basically we have two buckets that we can choose to throw on any fire. Water or Fuel.
Well, just for the record. I threw water on this particular fire the night before and that didn’t put the fire out. And I wasn’t really going to throw fuel, was I? I was going to say it NICELY.
Eh, perhaps it’s still fuel but what’s a girl to do? Well, since the water bucket didn’t work and God showed me that I was getting ready to use the big no-no of fuel, I asked God if I could just hit them alongside the head with the bucket instead. He said no.
Okay, okay, so the water didn’t work. The fuels out of the question and hitting them with the bucket would not be a good idea since God said not to.
The only thing left to do? Call the best Fire Fighter out there. So I’ll be praying for these individuals. First, I'll asked God to touch their hurts, because they wouldn’t be acting this way if they weren’t hurting. Second, I’ll be praying that he would softly whisper in their ears that they could hurt many other people with the words they have been saying.
I don’t need to play the Holy Spirit today… He does a very good job without my interference.
I got angry last night. You guessed it. Something was being done that could hurt people that I love. At first, I couldn’t even define how I felt. Randy gave me a huge hug and asked what was wrong. I stumbled through a few words before I figured it out and blurted, “I’m angry. That’s what’s wrong. I’m angry!”
I know, many of you are laughing at me right now, but STOP it… or I’ll be angry again today.
So last night in my anger, in a weak moment, I was going to say something. Well, to be more accurate, type something. I had just about had it with a few individuals. I typed it and all I had to do was hit the “share” button on facebook. I didn’t want to be mean; I just wanted to nicely tell them to shut up.
Yes, I did just say shut up. Am I being a little too real here?
Then the Holy Spirit tapped me on the shoulder and reminded me of that stupid Two Bucket illustration Pastor Bob Kapp uses.
Of course, I only say it's stupid because it was the last thing I wanted reminded of last night. I wanted to react. Perhaps I am being too honest? But let's be real, I bet everyone reading this has felt that was at some point.
Anyway, those of you that are CLA’er might have heard the bucket illustration before. For those of you that have not heard it; basically we have two buckets that we can choose to throw on any fire. Water or Fuel.
Well, just for the record. I threw water on this particular fire the night before and that didn’t put the fire out. And I wasn’t really going to throw fuel, was I? I was going to say it NICELY.
Eh, perhaps it’s still fuel but what’s a girl to do? Well, since the water bucket didn’t work and God showed me that I was getting ready to use the big no-no of fuel, I asked God if I could just hit them alongside the head with the bucket instead. He said no.
Okay, okay, so the water didn’t work. The fuels out of the question and hitting them with the bucket would not be a good idea since God said not to.
The only thing left to do? Call the best Fire Fighter out there. So I’ll be praying for these individuals. First, I'll asked God to touch their hurts, because they wouldn’t be acting this way if they weren’t hurting. Second, I’ll be praying that he would softly whisper in their ears that they could hurt many other people with the words they have been saying.
I don’t need to play the Holy Spirit today… He does a very good job without my interference.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Change
To say that my son, Nick, didn’t like change as a toddler, would be a huge understatement. When he was three, his grandparents took the carpet off of their stairs to replace it. Knowing full well that Nick hated change, my father-in-law took great joy in showing him the uncarpeted stairs and watching him melt down. Nick has been forever scarred.
Nick is not alone and while most of us wouldn’t do what he did at three – melt down about uncarpeted stairs, we don’t necessarily embrace change.
This morning, I read an article by Simon Barnes, entitled “People Like Change.” As I read the title I thought to myself, “this man obviously doesn’t know me.” I have had very few jobs in my life, I refuse to shop at Wegman’s no matter how great everyone says it is, and I actually enjoy vacationing at the exact same place each year.
Simon Barnes states in this article that, “Being totally change resistant seems like a very uncommon characteristic amongst human beings. Most people want new things. Most people want the latest gadgets and the newest deals. People want to move forward and make progress and be up with the times. If this wasn't the case then surely we wouldn't have mobile phones and ipods and the Internet.” He goes on to say that, “If people seem change resistant it’s probably because they feel vulnerable and powerless.”
Okay, so I have Blackberrry and don’t know how I ever survived without a laptop or the GPS we bought just a few weeks ago. So maybe I do like change.
Perhaps the change you and I don’t like really is the change that makes us feel vulnerable or powerless – change that we don’t know the outcome of. So maybe it’s not change that you and I dislike, maybe, just maybe, it’s the fear of the unknown that ties our stomach in knots and keeps us up at night.
As Christians, we don’t need to fear change. We can embrace it because we have a Heavenly Father that sees the beginning to the end of our journey – a journey that will include many changes and transitions.
This summer, when we get the upstairs re-carpeted in our home, I won’t melt down and neither will Nick. But I probably will never shop at Wegman’s regularly, because I do feel vulnerable and powerless in that store.
As for the other changes in my life; perhaps they will still tie my stomach in knots for a short while but the fact of the matter is, “My life is like an open book to God, he watched me grow from conception to birth; and all the stages of my life are spread out before him. He prepared all the days of my life before I'd even lived one day.” (Psalm 139)
It’s my job to simply trust him.
Nick is not alone and while most of us wouldn’t do what he did at three – melt down about uncarpeted stairs, we don’t necessarily embrace change.
This morning, I read an article by Simon Barnes, entitled “People Like Change.” As I read the title I thought to myself, “this man obviously doesn’t know me.” I have had very few jobs in my life, I refuse to shop at Wegman’s no matter how great everyone says it is, and I actually enjoy vacationing at the exact same place each year.
Simon Barnes states in this article that, “Being totally change resistant seems like a very uncommon characteristic amongst human beings. Most people want new things. Most people want the latest gadgets and the newest deals. People want to move forward and make progress and be up with the times. If this wasn't the case then surely we wouldn't have mobile phones and ipods and the Internet.” He goes on to say that, “If people seem change resistant it’s probably because they feel vulnerable and powerless.”
Okay, so I have Blackberrry and don’t know how I ever survived without a laptop or the GPS we bought just a few weeks ago. So maybe I do like change.
Perhaps the change you and I don’t like really is the change that makes us feel vulnerable or powerless – change that we don’t know the outcome of. So maybe it’s not change that you and I dislike, maybe, just maybe, it’s the fear of the unknown that ties our stomach in knots and keeps us up at night.
As Christians, we don’t need to fear change. We can embrace it because we have a Heavenly Father that sees the beginning to the end of our journey – a journey that will include many changes and transitions.
This summer, when we get the upstairs re-carpeted in our home, I won’t melt down and neither will Nick. But I probably will never shop at Wegman’s regularly, because I do feel vulnerable and powerless in that store.
As for the other changes in my life; perhaps they will still tie my stomach in knots for a short while but the fact of the matter is, “My life is like an open book to God, he watched me grow from conception to birth; and all the stages of my life are spread out before him. He prepared all the days of my life before I'd even lived one day.” (Psalm 139)
It’s my job to simply trust him.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Anniversary Weekend
Yesterday, Randy and I celebrated our 17th Wedding Anniversary... by taking three of our kids to the mall. Although that seems a tad odd, perhaps it was fitting, since we took Brandon on almost every "pre-marriage" date we ever went on. We started dating when Brandon was just a few weeks old and we took him everywhere with us. I will forever cherish the nights that we would lay him down on a blanket in the back seat of Randy’s Firebird and sit in Carlisle’s MJ Mall parking lot for hours just talking about our lives and our future together.
Times have for sure changed.
I assured you, there was no time for intimate conversation at the mall last night. Well, unless you count Nick advising me that, “that’s a grandma shirt, you can’t buy it or I won’t be seen at Youth with you.” Emily begging for an Aero shirt, “but Mom, look, this one really will fit me.” or Mia explaining to me that she “needs a cell phone.”
Okay, so I did tell Randy that he looked beastly in the black Aero shirt he bought for $7. Does that count as intimate?
Just like we do most years, we’ll celebrate our anniversary a few days late. On Sunday, we’ll sneak away for the day, have a picnic by a lake, and talk about our future together – about God’s future for us. If the last 17 years have taught us nothing else, it has taught us that it’s really not about our plan anyway.
I love how Eugene Peterson translates Proverbs 19:21, “We humans keep brainstorming options and plans, but God’s purpose prevails.”
Eight years ago, we had a well mapped out plan for our future on the table. Then God tipped our little table over, gave us a different map, and sent us out on a new journey. An incredibly, amazing, but sometimes scary and frustrating journey; a journey that has forever changed our lives.
Randy, I can’t wait to see what the next 17 years of this journey together brings. I am so proud of you and Godly man you are. I love you for all the big things and all the little things. You are an incredible husband and father. I love that after all these years, you still remember to hold my hand and open my doors. I know God has an amazing plan for us and can’t wait to see it unfold. There is no one I’d rather take this journey with. And just for the record, you do look beastly in your new shirt. I love you like crazy!
Times have for sure changed.
I assured you, there was no time for intimate conversation at the mall last night. Well, unless you count Nick advising me that, “that’s a grandma shirt, you can’t buy it or I won’t be seen at Youth with you.” Emily begging for an Aero shirt, “but Mom, look, this one really will fit me.” or Mia explaining to me that she “needs a cell phone.”
Okay, so I did tell Randy that he looked beastly in the black Aero shirt he bought for $7. Does that count as intimate?
Just like we do most years, we’ll celebrate our anniversary a few days late. On Sunday, we’ll sneak away for the day, have a picnic by a lake, and talk about our future together – about God’s future for us. If the last 17 years have taught us nothing else, it has taught us that it’s really not about our plan anyway.
I love how Eugene Peterson translates Proverbs 19:21, “We humans keep brainstorming options and plans, but God’s purpose prevails.”
Eight years ago, we had a well mapped out plan for our future on the table. Then God tipped our little table over, gave us a different map, and sent us out on a new journey. An incredibly, amazing, but sometimes scary and frustrating journey; a journey that has forever changed our lives.
Randy, I can’t wait to see what the next 17 years of this journey together brings. I am so proud of you and Godly man you are. I love you for all the big things and all the little things. You are an incredible husband and father. I love that after all these years, you still remember to hold my hand and open my doors. I know God has an amazing plan for us and can’t wait to see it unfold. There is no one I’d rather take this journey with. And just for the record, you do look beastly in your new shirt. I love you like crazy!
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Jump In
I keep a handful of 5x5x5 Bible Reading Plans on hand. I love this particular Bible Reading Plan, especially for those that are just beginning to practice the discipline of daily Scripture reading. Reading the New Testament is laid out quite simply; passages are read in just 5 minutes a day, 5 days a week. Also included in the plan are 5 suggestions for meditation, journaling, or further study to use on the other two days. It’s a great tool for developing the habit of daily time in the Word of God.
When I share this tool with someone, I always encourage them to start with the current date; to not try to catch up, and to remember to do the same thing if they ever get behind – to just jump back in where they are; don’t try to catch up before moving on. I stress that they should only work on catching up after the current dates reading is completed.
Why do I tell them that? Because I don’t want them to get discouraged, put off Bible reading until they have time to get catch up, or worst yet, stop reading the Word of God completely.
This year, I am reading through the Bible chronologically. Guess where this is going. Yup, I got behind! And did I take my own advice? Absolutely not!! Yeah, even though the Holy Spirit was whispering it in my ear. Okay, so perhaps He was screaming. (Can I admit this and everyone still love me?!?!) But hey, everyone knows that you can’t just jump in where you’re at when you are reading the Bible chronologically. Come on, I’d get confused, not understand what happened when, and besides daily Bible reading is not something new to me… been doing it for years. I knew I could handle it and get caught back up.
I kept reading most days but I was still behind and reading the Bible was becoming a drag *gasp* to me because I was really discouraged that I was behind. Hmm, heard that that could happen somewhere...
Insert slap alongside the head by God. Ugh! So this week, I took my own advice. I jumped in on the current date. Yeah, Bible reading has again become rewarding all of a sudden. Imagine that! I had to chuckle this morning when I realized that tomorrow, June 4th, on my wedding anniversary, the daily reading is the entire book of the Song of Solomon.
If you’d like to print out a copy of the 5x5x5 Bible Reading Plan, the link is on one of my blog posts from December 2009. It's entitled 5x5x5 Bible Reading Plan but whatever you do, don’t try to catch up – just jump in!
When I share this tool with someone, I always encourage them to start with the current date; to not try to catch up, and to remember to do the same thing if they ever get behind – to just jump back in where they are; don’t try to catch up before moving on. I stress that they should only work on catching up after the current dates reading is completed.
Why do I tell them that? Because I don’t want them to get discouraged, put off Bible reading until they have time to get catch up, or worst yet, stop reading the Word of God completely.
This year, I am reading through the Bible chronologically. Guess where this is going. Yup, I got behind! And did I take my own advice? Absolutely not!! Yeah, even though the Holy Spirit was whispering it in my ear. Okay, so perhaps He was screaming. (Can I admit this and everyone still love me?!?!) But hey, everyone knows that you can’t just jump in where you’re at when you are reading the Bible chronologically. Come on, I’d get confused, not understand what happened when, and besides daily Bible reading is not something new to me… been doing it for years. I knew I could handle it and get caught back up.
I kept reading most days but I was still behind and reading the Bible was becoming a drag *gasp* to me because I was really discouraged that I was behind. Hmm, heard that that could happen somewhere...
Insert slap alongside the head by God. Ugh! So this week, I took my own advice. I jumped in on the current date. Yeah, Bible reading has again become rewarding all of a sudden. Imagine that! I had to chuckle this morning when I realized that tomorrow, June 4th, on my wedding anniversary, the daily reading is the entire book of the Song of Solomon.
If you’d like to print out a copy of the 5x5x5 Bible Reading Plan, the link is on one of my blog posts from December 2009. It's entitled 5x5x5 Bible Reading Plan but whatever you do, don’t try to catch up – just jump in!
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Whipped Topping
Yesterday my three-year old, Mia, brings me a can of whipped topping and ask for a bowl of it. A bowl of whipped topping?!?! Come on Mia, what are you thinking?!?! Okay, so you’re three; maybe you’re not thinking. Some of you parents out there better take a deep breath and perhaps sit down. I not only squirted some whipped topping in a small bowl for her but I got out the sprinkles and put some on top.
Okay, before someone calls Child Protective Services, is this something that I would let her have every day? Of course not and let the record show that you will normally only find the fat free, sugar free, calorie free whipped topping in our house!
But sometimes you just have to break the rules. Sometime you just have to relax and have a random, fun moment or two. Over the years we have played hockey in the house, jumped on beds together (in motels, of course!), and ran outside just to play in the pouring down rain. We have laid out tarps and done splatter paint and organized crazy scavenger hunts with our friends.
The morning after one of our birthdays, we allow the kids to have left-over cake for breakfast. Who am I kidding? I have cake for breakfast that morning too! Don't even be judgmental. Have you ever had a donut and coffee for breakfast, huh?
There are days that we have dessert before dinner, some nights we throw mattresses on the living room floor and camp out, and we will not hesitate to turn a boring field trip into a photo shoot of ridiculous poses.
Last summer in the Webb home you would have found fashion shows with models sporting home-made newspaper clothes, creations made with shaving cream, photo shoots with a little man made out of aluminum foil and girls with feather dusters. One of my favorite photo-shoots included shots of random household appliances; like the doll-house people in the mixer bowl labeled “blended family.”
This summer, remember to take time to relax, break the rules a few times, and surprise your kids with some out of the ordinary fun. Better yet, ask them for some suggestions. If you run out of ideas, feel free to stop over – there is rarely a dull moment here!
Okay, before someone calls Child Protective Services, is this something that I would let her have every day? Of course not and let the record show that you will normally only find the fat free, sugar free, calorie free whipped topping in our house!
But sometimes you just have to break the rules. Sometime you just have to relax and have a random, fun moment or two. Over the years we have played hockey in the house, jumped on beds together (in motels, of course!), and ran outside just to play in the pouring down rain. We have laid out tarps and done splatter paint and organized crazy scavenger hunts with our friends.
The morning after one of our birthdays, we allow the kids to have left-over cake for breakfast. Who am I kidding? I have cake for breakfast that morning too! Don't even be judgmental. Have you ever had a donut and coffee for breakfast, huh?
There are days that we have dessert before dinner, some nights we throw mattresses on the living room floor and camp out, and we will not hesitate to turn a boring field trip into a photo shoot of ridiculous poses.
Last summer in the Webb home you would have found fashion shows with models sporting home-made newspaper clothes, creations made with shaving cream, photo shoots with a little man made out of aluminum foil and girls with feather dusters. One of my favorite photo-shoots included shots of random household appliances; like the doll-house people in the mixer bowl labeled “blended family.”
This summer, remember to take time to relax, break the rules a few times, and surprise your kids with some out of the ordinary fun. Better yet, ask them for some suggestions. If you run out of ideas, feel free to stop over – there is rarely a dull moment here!
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